You, Powerful Momma, Deserve a Blessingway!

A couple of my big passions lately are getting Dancing For Birth and Mother Blessings, also known as a Blessingway, known in the birth community here in Arizona..

A Blessingway is a traditional Navajo ceremony celebrating a women's rite of passage into motherhood. I recently read that the Navajo do not approve of the use of the name Blessingway so it has been re-coined Mother Blessing for the "westernized" version. Traditionally a Mother Blessing is a gathering of women only who sit in a circle of empowerment and share blessings and life experiences to help prepare a mother for her own upcoming birth. These gatherings are meant to  spiritually and emotionally uplift the mother-to-be and help her feel supported by her community, or village as I've been feeling moved to say lately.

To me, baby showers are not as powerful. Yes you may get things for the mother to help her prepare for the baby but babies don't really need a lot of things. Let's focus on the mother! This is her journey, her major life experience, let her enjoy that. There are too many pregnancy and birth trauma stories in the world. Dig down deep to your roots, to your powerful, primal inner childbearing woman!

I have seen and heard of a great many variations of just what exactly happens at a Mother Blessing. The main point everyone has said though is that it is so the mother feels loved, supported and pampered. So far I have encountered a few specific themes for Mother Blessings and here they are and some other ideas to get you going:

Dance Circle - Of course this is my favorite and the ones I like to plan the most, especially since I can use my Dancing For Birth training for this. Exactly as it says all the women come together in a circle for dancing just like those primal days when we'd come together and dance naked around the fire just celebrating and enjoying life and that new life is about to come into the world. Generally when I'm asked to put together the Dance Circle I teach some basic movements that are really good for the birthing mother that will help alleviate certain pains and help her be more at ease. of course I teach to the group and we do a Baby Welcoming Dance and I generally choreograph another song and that takes up about 1-2 hours. I aim for happiness and empowerment through dance and try my best to bring that to the mother.

Bead Ceremony - Another really great one and one that I see often because it's simple. Basically a jar of beads is passed around the circle of women and each woman chooses a bead that she feels drawn to for the birthing mother. Once all are chosen it goes around in a circle and everyone states why they chose that bead for the her and give an inspiration or affirmation for the mother and her upcoming birth. Once all the beads are collected they can be loosely put into a bag for the mother to have for her labor as a "little bag of love" I like to call it, strung together in a bracelet, anklet or necklace. Personally I like to string them together as a chord with a pendant on the end to just be able to hold on to or as a barefoot sandal that can be worn during her labor (maybe even while she's dancing through her labor!) The general feeling is that she has each supporting woman in her life "with" her at her birth through these beads, loving and supporting her.

I recently planned one this way for my best friend of ten years, who now lives 2,000 miles away from me, and I did it in a way that all her long distance friends could "attend". I set up a grid of beads took a photo and sent it to everyone and asked them to choose a bead and send a little note that I could print up and send with it. I'm assembling it into a chord and pendant and mailing it to her before her labor so even though we're all apart we're all thinking of her and supporting her.

Chord Ceremony - With all the women in a circle a single piece of string/yarn/ribbon/etc. (generally red, red being a color of power perfect for empowering women through birth) is wound around the wrists of each woman. Each woman ties it around the wrist of the next as they talk of positive things about the mother and inspirations for her birth. All the women wear the chords to remind them of her and send positive energy her way until they hear that the mother is in labor and then cut the chord as a symbol of unity in supporting the mother.

Paint Party - This is where all the women sit together and paint/doodle while telling birth stories and experiences giving empowerment to the mother to be. All the paintings are put together either each individually given to the mother or strung all together. These are particularly amazing for home births to once all be pt together to have a poster sized collage in the mother's birthing space.

Pampering - So this last one it all about giving unto the birthing mother. A lot of these can be done in one Blessing and allows each person to give something to the mother and do something for the mother. Things like at the beginning of the blessing all the women make a crown of flowers for the mother to wear while she's being pampered. Foot massages, painting toenails, shoulder massages, brushing her hair are great things to do for the mother.

Some other fun things to do are Henna. There are many traditions for henna during childbearing if you can find someone who does it or learn to do it yourself it will be a fun experience for all. Belly casting is another great thing. Especially if you paint the cast after it has set, it makes for a beautiful and unique keepsake for the Mother. Lastly one of my favorites is everyone agreeing to light a candle when they hear the mother has gone into labor. It creates the same kind of unity, in my opinion, as the chord ceremony and is a really beautiful sentiment. I know when I light a candle every time I get around it I think of that wonderful scent and then I'm like "Ooo I wonder how she is doing".

Well I think that's everything and I hope I've inspired you to have a Mother Blessing for yourself or for another special woman you may know. Another great thing about Mother Blessings is they're generally pretty low cost, which in today's economy is great! You can inquire about my Mother Blessing services and other specific services that I can refer you to for a Mother Blessing by using the "Contact Form" in the right sidebar.

In Love & Light, Blessed Be.

UNICEF At Work!

I recently stumbled upon The Golden Bow as UNICEF's symbol for the protection, promotion and support of breastfeeding. I definitely went searching for a ribbon as opposed to a bow when my fiancee first suggested I find something to symbolize my passion for promoting breastfeeding. Instead I found a bow and there is actually a specific reason for the choice of using a bow. UNICEF has given a special message to each part of the bow and every part is crucial to it's make up. So what exactly is the reasoning behind The Golden Bow?

Gold:
Gold being used to show that breastfeeding is the "gold" standard for infant feeding and that all other forms of infant feeding should be judged against breastfeeding instead of the opposite which has sadly become the social norm where more parents are preparing to buy and stock up on infant formula in preparation for the birth of their children instead of educating and preparing themselves for breastfeeding.

The Bow:
One loop represents the Mother.

The other loop represents the Child.

The ribbon itself is symmetrical representing that both Mother and Child are crucial to the successful breastfeeding relationship.

The knot represents the Father, the Family and Society. Without the knot there can be no bow, without support breastfeeding cannot be successful.

UNICEF states that the ribbons are the future: the exclusive breastfeeding for six months, and continued breastfeeding for 2 years or more with appropriate complementary feeding, and the delay of the next birth, preferably for 3 years or more, to give the mother and child time together to recover and to grow, respectively, and to five the mother the time she needs to provide active care for the health, growth and development of this child.

The exclusive origins of the symbolism are not directly known the use of The Golden Bow has been in scattered use for 8-10 years. However UNICEF is proud to launch this symbol and educational campaign. Wear it proudly and educate everyone who inquires about its symbolism and many meanings.

Natural Tips & Tricks to Battle the Cold Season

I am a big advocate for Attachment Parenting, natural medicine and breastfeeding and along my path I realized I did more natural things to me to battle my little one's recent colds and fevers and then asked some midwives if what I was doing was, well, "medically proven" for lack of a better word and of course Mommy's instincts know best and like always I feel the need to share! So, here are some natural attachment parenting ways to battle those nasty little colds and the wonders of the always important breast milk.

1. Skin to skin. Just because you're little one isn't a newborn anymore doesn't mean they won't benefit from some skin to skin contact to help regulate their body temperature and help break those fevers fast. When little one is too hot, your body becomes cooler, helping bring down little's fever. Granted, all you Mommy's might get a little sweaty but isn't it worth it if your little one feels better? Skin to skin will come up more throughout the next few topics.
2. Breastfeed. Mommy's milk does a baby good and give it in no short supply! Breast milk is the best form of hydration during a sickness for your little one. Pedialyte is not my favorite but it is always the first thing recommended for a sick baby.and really all they need is breast milk. We are on demand feeders, which is the best way to feed your baby, but if you're not used to that whenever you notice your little one getting fussy or giving normal cues of hunger offer the breast first. Now, this will be quite often which is good your little one is getting comfort and your antibodies. As soon as baby comes into contact with Mommy's breast, baby's saliva actually influences the content of the breastmilk. Another one of nature's wonders and why breast is best! If baby is having a hard time nursing from the breast try a dropper, spoon or cup. I found my little one did great with a cup and remember to keep baby upright. Bottles will be just as difficult and also in younger ones you want to avoid nipple confusion.
3. Co-sleeping. This can also go along with skin to skin and helps with on demand feeding. Personally, I feel best sleeping shirtless with little one just in a diaper, this all night temperature regulation is great for working through a fever. This also helps both little one and Mommy get better rest for recovery since little one is able to feed before ever becoming fully awake and waking you with a crying unhappy baby. You can also sleep upright with baby sleeping against your chest. I usually end up on the couch or with a massive wall of pillows in bed to help keep us upright through the night.
4. Nurse Upright. I found Kelly Mom has a few good photos and descriptions on their page for nursing upright. The ones to pay attention to that I have found most convenient are the holds with mom leaning back, the elevated football hold, and the "down under" position are great for sick ones. Nursing upright helps mucous drain out the nose to help relieve coughing from mucous draining down the back of the throat.
5. Babywearing. Babywearing is probably one of my favorite things to do in general and it is the greatest thing for a sick baby. First of all, you know when baby is sick all they want to do is snuggle with Mommy and are inconsolable most of the time you're not in eye sight and so babywearing solves that one. Another great thing, I find it super easy when baby falls asleep to just sit on the couch and take a little cat nap myself. Again you want to use holds that keep baby upright just like with breastfeeding it helps mucous drain. The Baby Wearer has a few good descriptions of some good holds. It also helps skin to skin, it is too easy to put baby in a wrap without a shirt or with a tank top and be comfortable and no need to fret about baby over heating in the wrap because your body again will regulate baby's temperature.
6. Other Natural Wonders of Breastmilk.  Now these may seem a little strange to some moms but I promise they work because of breastmilk's antimicrobial properties and because I've used them myself! Take this very literally if your little one is very congested and nothing else is working squirt some breastmilk into baby's nose. This helps to loosen up the mucous just like a saline spray and if you want you can use a nasal sucker but steer clear of the ones that require you to insert anything into baby's nose. Another great use for breastmilk is for ear infections. I found a nice little how to at eHow Mom and we used a 3-3-3 method, 3 drops 3 times a day for 3 days, and it worked really well. After each set of drops I put a warm cloth around her ear and it seemed very comforting. I've also used breastmilk topically on rashes and it clears them up quick and even expressed some on a finger and rubbed it over her eyes to get rid of the eye yuckies they develop with colds. She had it so bad one day she could barely open her eyes and breastmilk cleared her eyes up by the end of the day and it didn't return throughout her cold.
7. Honey.  I always try to first battle a cough with honey and most of the time it helps cut down on the rough night time coughs. I'm not a fan of child/infant cold medicine and most nowadays are not recommended for children under the age of 6 anyway, just in case you didn't know. I do about a teaspoon at a time and since you can't overdose on honey I redose as often as needed. Honey is a natural source of energy as well so make sure you watch out for the hypers but usually it just makes my kids feel good. From Ian Paul, M.D. who did a study on honey in the Archives of Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine; honey's thick syrup coats and soothes the back of the throat, while the sweet taste causes salvation, which thins mucous and reduces the urge to cough. Honey's antioxidants may even help the body fend of nasty cold bugs, thereby alleviating cold symptoms. I have read on a few parenting sites not to give honey to children under 1 because it is a known source of a bacterial spore that can cause the very rare infantile botulism which is caused by the baby ingesting a bacteria that produces toxins in the body. So for those under 1 breastmilk breastmilk breastmilk!

General disclaimer, most of these are considered homeopathic remedies or alternative medicine and aren't "medically" backed. So, like always consult your pediatrician, midwife or doctor. If baby appears to be in severe pain or inconsolable it's always best to have them checked by a medical professional because there may be more going on than you realize.

Brightest Blessings and Speedy Recoveries!

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The "New" World of Cloth Diapers

I'll admit, cloth diapers intimidated the pants off of me. They still kind of do but we are venturing into that world for cost and practicality. There are so many options out there today it can scare anyone. Thanks to a class I attended at Midwives Rising!, and taught by a consultant friend with Diaper Parties and another who owns her own company Hookin' For Rent and makes woolies and other nifty things, I learned a lot of really good information that I thought I would share and kind of organize my thoughts for myself. Information was also collected mostly from talking to my Grama, who must have had a nice little flash back about cloth diapering me, was very helpful as well especially since she's always bought me pre-folds for my babies and I just used them as burp clothes and such. Now I might finally get to use them for what they were intended for!

So, the main types I remember; All in Ones, Pocket Diapers, Diaper Covers, Pre-folds and Fitteds.

• Diaper Covers explain themselves. They're just the outer cover that helps to prevent leaks from the absorbent part of the pre-fold or fitted diaper.
• Pre-folds are what we, not so sure about cloth diapering because that looks difficult, parents are used to seeing from when our grandparents changed our butts and tried to give us and said don't forget the rubber pants! So when we get them they're usually used as burp cloths and nursery rags.
• Fitteds are really nice it takes a lot of the hassle out of pre-folds because the diaper fits and snaps nicely around baby. It has to be a nice fabric that won't irritate baby's skin like anything else and requires a cover, since it is all just fabric, to prevent leaks.
• All in Ones, pretty self explanatory, they have the absorbent part of the diaper built into the cover. So it's the closest to disposables. Take it off, clean baby and put a new one on. No assembly required, very convenient and a little pricey.
• Pocket Diapers, honestly seems to be my favorite for a middle ground in ease and affordability. The cover has a nice little pocket built into it by a cloth inner lining. You get inserts and can adjust the level of absorbency by how many and what kind of inserts you put in the pocket between the cover and inner lining. Again you take the whole diaper off but you have to separate the inserts before washing. If you pre-stuff the diapers you can just grab another and put it on or stuff as you go.

So many different kinds of fabric go into and are a part of every cloth diaper but which does what and is best for baby and parents and absorbancy?

• Cotton is the most common fabric when you think of cloth diapers. Cotton is generally mixed in with one of the many other fabrics of diapers for durability.
• Microfiber absorbs quickly and pulls the moisture away from baby's bottom. It is not ideal for the interior of the diaper against baby's skin but is great as an insert.
• Hemp is organic and the most absorbent fiber. It's not the softest so it's not best for use against baby's skin but again ideal as an insert.
• Bamboo is the most desirable. It's super soft and pulls moisture away from baby's bottom. It is naturally anti-fungal, microbial and bacterial. Bamboo is naturally organic and in most diapers it is mixed with another fabric for durability. It's also pretty pricey from what I've found.
• Fleece is the very absorbent and very thin which helps keep baby's diaper trimmer looking because a lot of others make baby's diaper bulky.
• Wool is what is used for heavy leakers since wool usually absorbs and locks in wetness. It's pretty desirable and expensive but it's a good natural fiber to use.
• Polyurethane is what is usually used for diaper covers as opposed to the old time rubber pants (love you Gram).

Personally right now my favorites are pocket diapers and pre-folds and covers. I'm very excited to take this new adventure. I was prepared to do it before for one I had a lack of the "new" and pre-existing information, honey wasn't very supportive of cloth diapering even when I was briefly thinking of trying it before but he rarely changes diapers anyways so that's not really a factor anymore. Hopefully this is helpful to others!

Brightest Blessings!