I'm Pregnant! Now What?

First of all, your Enchanted Desert Doulas want to congratulate you on beginning this sacred journey!!

Now, the first step for you is to answer "Where do I want to give birth?" Your choices generally are at home, at a birth center, or at a hospital. Once you have decided that, then the question becomes "Who do I want to hire to deliver my baby at this location?"

If you have chosen a hospital birth we would highly recommend Valley Women for Women, MomDoc Midwives, and The Center for True Harmony. We have personal experience working with each of these offices and they have fantastic care providers. Mercy Gilbert Medical Center is a fantastic hospital to give birth and we love assisting here, we can't recommend this place enough!

If you have chosen a birth center we recommend The Birth Haven at LifeSpring Midwifery having personal experience working with them and using them as a care provider. There are a few other birth centers in the area including, Blossom Birth Center we know a few of the providers there and they are really wonderful, and Babymoon Inn,

If you have chosen a home birth we'd highly recommend Moxie Midwifery, we work closely with Moxie Midwifery and a Mother Roaster package of ours is now included with her Midwifery package! We also have personal experience with using Moxie Midwifery as a care provider. She is an amazingly spirited woman. Pam White is an extremely talented and experienced midwife. She is a really great midwife to work with and has 30 years of experience to pull from, we highly recommend taking n interview with her she has a very mothering presence and becomes part of the family. Freedom and the Seed I've had the pleasure of working with and teaching classes for her clients, she is very active advocating for the rights for homebirthing in Arizona and loves what she does, Beyond Conception Midwifery I've had the pleasure of working with, lots of experience and really knows what she's doing. Also recommended is Arizona Midwife, a great woman I've met,

Another question you could ask after choosing you primary care provider is "Do I want a Doula?" Sometimes you may hear the suggestion and wonder "What is a Doula?" and you can read our brief description of a doula HERE. Many women think that when they're choosing a hospital birth that a doula doesn't serve them when in fact in 2014 75% of Enchanted Desert Doula's clients were planned hospital births! Yes we go to hospitals, birth centers and home births! We do it all. Of course here is our shameless plug for Enchanted Desert Doula and our service menu. You can also go to Doula Match and search there for your perfect doula.

No matter where you choose to give birth, please remember, you are the consumer! Interviewing OBs and Midwives is the same process. Choose a few you'd like to interview because this is one of the most important decisions in your journey and you want the right people who share your goals, and always have you and your well-being in mind and not just the clock. There are many others around the valley these are just the ones we have used and worked with and know the most about. Do your research, be an informed consumer and have your best birth!

*This is an ever evolving list of care professionals we've worked with and had good experiences with. Check back often and share with friends and family for updated information!

Daisy's Domineering Doula

Did you see Bones last night? I did and it featured what they portray to be a doula but this doula, named Valentina(Mindy Cohn) is everything a doula IS NOT, or should not be. Daisy(Carlo Gallo) is going through childbirth on her own and has decided she needs added support and hires a doula. "Great!" is what I originally thought, I was very wrong. Yes there are the occasional very crunchy doulas but she does things that go beyond just sharing some crunchy information. Valentina is judgmental and controlling.




In this clip she judges the way Angela(Michaela Conlin) gave birth and says "Everyone has to make their own choices, is what I believe, but you seem like a nice person, your child should be fine." after Angela tells her she had and epidural and was screaming. That is so very not right! We don't judge! Angela thought her birthing process was beautiful and in the end that's all that matters, is what the mother thinks of her birth not anyone else.

Then the way he steered Daisy into the office for her appointment and ignoring her obvious want for Angela to be with her is just insane. The mother makes those choices!


Later in the Episode when Daisy's water breaks in the lab she says asks "Will someone remind them that Valentina wants a darkened room and bird sounds?" It doesn't matter what Valentina wants! Again it is about what the mother wants! A doula sure can suggest that dim lighting and nature sounds might be soothing for you but ultimately it is for the mother to decide what will soothe her during her labor.

Photo from: https://plus.google.com/u/0/+BONES/posts

In the end Daisy stands up for herself and tells Valentina that she doesn't want all these things and fires her. Honestly, she should have interviewed more doulas! Valentina just wasn't her doula, or in my opinion very professional at all. Thankfully Daisy was surrounded by those that loved and supported her most for her beautiful journey into motherhood. So if you watched this episode please know this is not what a doula is! A doula is a loving, support person, a person who educates and empowers, listens and respects you the goddess giving birth. A doula supports your decisions and how you want to give birth and who you want with you when you give birth.

Mother Roaster Service Menu

       Crossing the threshold from maiden to mother is a massive undertaking that not only needs to be recognized and ceremonially honored, but deeply necessitates a healing touch that can welcome the new mama with open arms. As a postpartum receiver, you are charged with holding space for women on the other side of birth, you are reminded of being reverent with your service to her, and you are blessed to be her witness as she starts feeding her baby milk, heals her body, and begins to seal the rawness of her birth experience. You are there to wrap her in a blanket of your loving care, warm her insides, massage her, create herbal tinctures for her, feed her warm soups, and gift her with ceremony.
Mother Roasters are CAREGIVERS that nurture new mothers after BIRTH while supporting their RECOVERY + JOURNEY into motherhood; as EVERY women deserves to be welcomed into MOTHERHOOD through GENTLE + LOVING + CARE.  

Mother Roaster Service Menu

Basic Belly Binding - $75

Includes:

 Unbleached muslin wrap

 Belly firming paste

 One in-home demonstration and directions card

Wrapping the belly is an effective and important part of a mama’s recovery that aids the body to shrink and recover in a shorter time period, normally six to eight weeks. A sacred belly wrap provides a mama’s postpartum body with 360 support to assist the abdominal wall muscle retraction, improve posture, stabilize loosened ligaments, and provide support to the torso while vital organs return to their pre-pregnancy size and position.  

Closing Ceremony - $175

Includes:

 Sacred Ceremonial tuck-in

 Heated oil rub down- Approx. 30 min

 Belly binding & wrap

Birth is an incredible, amazing, intense journey. As women, our bodies go through a lot of hard work to bring a child into the world. All of this work, through the triumphs, sorrows and joys, the sweat & tears, we are left open. We must allow ourselves to be open when we birth a child. That openness can then leave us feeling empty after birth. Our bodies have been a vessel that carried and nurtured a small one (or even several small ones) for months. It is no wonder that our bodies would experience a vast emptiness once we have completed the birthing process. So, what then? How do we close ourselves after we have opened for something as incredible as birth? Well, why not have a beautiful closing ceremony.

Hot Stone Abdominal Press - $65

Includes:

 Heated oil rub down- approx. 30min

 Hot stone abdominal press- approx. 30-45min

This practice relieves tense muscles, begins to breakdown stubborn pregnancy body fat and improves overall circulation.

Goddess Package- $250

Includes:

 Your choice of the Milk & Honey or Malay Bath*

 Sacred Mother Blessing

 Custom made flower crown

 Custom made birth journal

 Oil rub down
 Ceremonial tuck-in

 Belly Binding & wrap

 Your choice of 1 tea and 1 soup off the add-on menu

    

 * plus $25 if you chose the Malay Bath.

  Honoring is a Sacred Way to acknowledge a Rite of Passage in a person's life. There is no more sacred of an act than that of becoming a mother and birthing a child into the world. When a woman births a baby she also births herself anew. She is no longer maiden, as she steps into the tribe of mothers that is held together by our common bond. The Beauty
Way is how we roll in the Sacred World, its how we like to leave each sister and each place we visit...more beautiful and with a little more sparkle than was there before we came on the scene. Its also living with care and reverence for the earth and each other. The Beauty Way is an aspiration, a journey if you will, and gives us something to strive for.

Questions to Ask Before Hiring a Doula

Hiring a doula has a lot to do with if you "click" but it also has to do with if the doula offers the things you are looking for. It is good to know a lot about your doula and her experience and specialties. It is also highly recommended to interview more then one doula. You need to be 100% comfortable with your choice because this person is going to be right by your side as your family goes through this sacred transition into motherhood. A good doula will not be offended if you would like to interview more doulas or if the feel is not right. She might even be able to point you to a better fit because she understands how important the chemistry is. So don't be afraid to ask. Below are a list of questions that are a good idea to ask at your doula interview. Feel free to add any questions about things that are important to you.

• How Many births have you attended?
• Are you familiar with the Doctor/Midwife/Hospital/Birth Center I will be using? 
• When should I call you? When would you come join me in labor?
• What labor coping techniques do you use or find most helpful?
• How will you involve my partner?
• Why did you decided to become a doula?
• What are your fees and what do they cover? How many visits will we have before and after baby?
• What kind of training have you had?
• Can you explain your contract and your refund policy?
• How many clients do you take on a month?
• Do you have a back up doula? Will I be meeting them?
• Do you have any references?
• What are your beliefs on the birthing process?

Ask the Doula

During consultations and along the pregnancy journey I get asked some really great questions. I wanted to share some of these questions and my personal answers so you get to know more about myself and my practice.

If I were to miscarry, would you still attend the birth if there is one?
A miscarriage is a hard thing to go through and giving birth to your baby in that situation can be heartbreaking and I am honored to still serve you. A beautiful baby is still being born and I feel I am still your labor support. After the birth I will help you find resources, per your request, to help you deal with the loss of your child and, if you wish, arrange a Mother Blessing for your friends and family to come help you heal.

If I choose cord blood banking can I still do delayed cord clamping?
Given some of my research through contacting cord blood banking companies (Viacord and Cord Blood Registry) they prefer to obtain cord blood 60 seconds after the birth. For delayed cord clamping it is suggested to wait at least two minutes. This two minute delay will increase the child's iron reserve by 27-47mg which is helpful in preventing iron deficiencies in baby's first 6 months. Now, the ideal suggestion for delayed cord clamping is to wait until the cord stops pulsating and in my experience can take up to ten minutes. Given that evidence and how much cord blood banking costs I personally would say no. My preference is to delayed cord clamping but I am your Doula and I will get you more information, if you desire, so you can make an informed decision.

What is your opinion on epidurals? I think I am open to the idea if I feel I need it but I am unsure and want to strive for my birth to be as natural as possible.
As we go over your birth plan if you are open to pain relief during labor, that is your choice. I am not here to push my personal choices and preferences on you, I will provide you with my side of the argument as well as the opposing argument so that you may make an informed decision that you are going to be happy with. Sometimes it is necessary for you to allow yourself that relief if you need it and there can be many different reasons why you choose to accept an epidural (i.e. long labor, pitocin induced contractions etc). As your Doula I am not there to tell your doctor "She said in her birth plan she doesn't want that." I can however gently remind you of your birth plan and  to take a minute to think about your choices and what you would like to do moving forward.

My partner is really interested in a Doula to help him know what is going on and what he can do to help during the birth, is that something you do?
Yes! During your prenatal visits we'll go over  pain coping techniques with partner assistance so you both have valuable tools for labor. If you or your partner ever have questions prenatally and during labor and delivery you are more than welcome to ask and if I don't know the answer I likely know someone who does and will get that answer for you. If your partner is open to it or asks "What can I do to help?" there is always something to do and I'm happy to give you what I'm doing if you like or give you something helpful to do :-) I am also there for the little "Hey can you help me by... moments."

What if I don't like something you're doing or think I might want you to try something else?
Our relationship is all about open communication. I am going to use my skills to try and help you any way I know how. If it's not helping, tell me so! I promise not to be hurt or offended. If you have an idea of what you think might help I'm happy to help get you to that space/position. If all you can do is describe what or where the pain is we'll work together through many positions to find out what works best for you.

Have Questions? Use the Contact Me form to the right to ask and/or set up a consultation for us to meet and discuss what I can do for you!